There is so much to do,

so much, that i would love to do but limited time and therefore I try to rush to a result, I want quick results, because I feel like I’m behind, that I’m missing out on stuff. For one this causes me anxiety, also makes me nervous when I’m not progressing. Every time I’m not doing something productive, I feel like I’m wasting time. This also causes me anxiety, and doesn’t really allow me to relax. I know I should take it slow, do what I do one step at a time, and I shouldn’t expect immediate, great results. I should focus on my development, on improving my skills, be it photography, writing, graphic design. Whenever I managed to concentrate on the next small step, only on that one little task or project I was able to work more freely, more stress free and I actually got better results. Moreover, when I was able to switch my perspective on my development to something like “it’s alright, I’m not there yet, I’m not a professional photographer/designer,/writer, my work doesn’t have to be on the same level as the work of professionals”, If i can just tell this to myself, I feel so much better, I’m not stressed about creativity and actually I’m more creative and more productive. I will focus on this more. I will remind myself about that more, even every day. I will notice bad thought patters. And I already know what will help me accomplish this. I will get back to meditating regularly.

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